From pregnancy through the birth of your first child, you being to realize just how much your body is not your own. Now, everything you consume, do, and prepare for is for someone else. Maybe you were someone who put others first before you had your first child, served your husband before yourself, could grasp the concept that your body hosts the Holy Spirit and living for others & for Jesus was already your life. For me, it wasn’t until motherhood that I willingly and admit-tingly shockingly had to die to myself moment by moment, day by day, for my new baby and ultimately for my Lord & Savior. Leading up to the moment of becoming a Mom, my desire to be a Mom was placed in my heart, the prayers grew in number, and my longing grew stronger as I went months waiting for God to send me my first babe. Well, the day arrived (more to tell on this a later day) and all the foods I had been consuming, all the caffeine I was consuming, the late nights, the extra working hours, the three jobs, the unsafe well-watered, mice-infested cottage we were living in, the location away from family, all we had built, all the desire I had, you see were this is going… Jump ahead 12 weeks – 3 jobs quit, an art business packed up to collect dust in the basement of my in-laws house, and a tough goodbye to our community later, we were now in Kansas. Alone but with family, plans to buy a home but no job or money, debt, and baby bills piling up. Was this was I had prayed for? Yup. But that wasn’t all… we had peace. While living suppressed, while dying to my every selfish desire, now living for a tiny human, God was at work, and not in this white picket fence story I had in my head. He was pruning and cleaning out my heart. He knew this was ultimately my hearts desire too. Before my babe came along, I may have had 3 jobs, but man was I lonely, and although the 3 jobs filled my time, it was mostly self-serving, and really, exactly what the world said I should be doing in my 20’s (especially COVID years & beyond). And my home… ya that was a mess too. So flip forward past my really boring * lonely pregnancy and there I am, nursing my baby boy. He needed nothing else in this whole world, but his Mama. Oh, motherhood. If he cried, he needed his Mama. He woke and needed only me. He needed me to sleep, to learn, to play to teach him, to carry him, to keep him warm, to regulate his body temperature, keep him from illness, to grow him, to love on him, to hear him, to be there all the time. All Day. All night. I no longer got to choose my bed time, the time I ate, what I did that day (for the most part) or rest in my own selfish desires – yes, I am aware of free will, and on the flip side Mom guilt, but have you ever completely surrendered every moment of your day over to God, understood that even your baby cries that is God’s promptings to you, alongside that small voice inside your head when you wonder about a need they have and that willingness to serve your child at any given moment? Sanctification: the process of being freed from sin and purified. God’s will for us is to be obedient to His will for us, so we can allow Him to cleanse our hearts from sin, purify us, and for me, motherhood is where I noticed it began and I never want it to end. Selfishness, living your day for yourself, living for self declared happiness, that is a sin. Let Jesus in, let Him determine your day, your mundane tasks, your big accomplishments. You will have peace. The days & moments & weeks I did not have peace in motherhood were the moments I was doing tasks & desiring things that were not Surrendered to Him & were not of His will. If I let my baby tell me what his needs were, when he was hungry, when he enjoyed floor time, when he was tired, this was how God created him to communicate to me and prompt me to know what to do next. When I tried to google everything, try to please other people, or make my baby do something I wanted to do but was not in their best interest and was not best for both of us, that’s when the shopping trips were crying fests (for both of us) or the anxiety levels skyrocketed, or the mom guilt (really we should call it instincts from God) kicked in. God wanted me to be in tune & in step with Him & my baby. He wanted me to let go of my ideas, rules, standards, selfish desires and expectations and live for Him alone, which meant also selflessly serving others, loving yourself and realizing none of this is about you. When you step into the eternal perspective of motherhood and follow His calling, not the worlds calling of expectations or pretty painted pictures on social media, that’s when the sanctification begins and the indescribable peace overcomes you. And your all-sufficient, all-knowing, loving Creator and Maker will mold & shape you into your new life of Motherhood.
“it wasn’t until motherhood that I willingly and admit-tingly shockingly had to die to myself moment by moment, day by day, for my new baby and ultimately for my Lord & Savior.” – Nicole LesherRead more: Motherhood: A Sanctification Process
Life Set Apart 